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pleasantdalers posting in
pleasantdale Jan. 23rd, 2013 01:59 pm)
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(doot doot doot tone - think Cialis type theme or similar)
Randy: Good morning, Pleasantdale! This is Randal “Randy” Johnson.
Annie: And I’m Annabelle “Annie” Mitchell. We hope you’re having a Pleasant day!
Randy: Today’s top news story is a transportation mishap. The on-road leading to the interstate north to New York City is temporarily closed due to a bridge collapse. Mayor Tuttleford has vowed to get the bridge back in working order as soon as possible. He is working closely with the New Jersey Department of Transportation to make this happen - but for now, those heading to the big city will need to take the detour along the southern interstate to get to their destination.
Annie: Due to traffic and route, this can add up to an hour to your commute time - so be sure to leave early to get to your destination on time. Now let’s talk about that mysterious bright flash that had a lot of people worried last week. Rumors were flying - everything from Communist invasion to alien attack.
(Both Laugh)
Randy: The official police word on the ‘mysterious’ light is that it was nothing more than some bikers setting off fireworks in the woods. A small fire was caused as a result, but there were no injuries.
Annie: What ruffians, Randy.
Randy: I’ll say. In other police news, we have a missing hunter who needs to be found. Officials report that Stuart Henderson was last seen by his wife Patty five days ago, when he left on a hunting trip to try out the new gun he’d received over the holidays.
Annie: Poor Patty and her boy, Stewie Jr, are frantic. Anyone who knows of Stuart Senior’s current whereabouts, or who has seen him in the last five days, is urged to contact us here at the radio station, or call the sheriff right away with any information.
Randy: What a tragic situation. But speaking of guns, here’s a word from one of our sponsors -- Seth’s Arms.
===========================================
SETH ARMS COMMERCIAL
Gordon Seth: [countryish semi-monotone] Hello. I’m Gordon Seth, of Seth Arms. We provide a variety of rifles, shotguns, pistols, ammunition, and other firearm accessories for the discerning huntsman. Come by today and choose from our fine line of hunting products, including the Savage 24 combination .22 rifle and shotgun for only $39.95 if you mention this advertisement, great for hunting, home defense, and civil defense. Stop by today and bring home a gun the entire family can enjoy.
[whispered just before tape clips off] ...how was that?
===========================================
Annie: Thank you, Seth... I’m sure we’ll... be stopping in.
Randy: *clears throat* Now back to the news. Annie, did you know this Saturday is Founder’s Day?
Annie: Of course, Randy! How could I forget? It’s the day we celebrate those pioneering men who named our pleasant little town, way back when they bought it from the Indians for three blankets and a large cheese.
Randy: And How. (Indian-ish How)
(Both laugh)
Annie: There’ll be games, skits, contests, and civic speeches from Mayor Tuttleford and the city council. It’s sure to be a swell time for all.
Randy: And after you return home from Founder’s Day festivities, be sure to tune in to Captain Mystery’s Strange Theater. Let’s see what the Captain’s exploring this week --
===========================================
CAPTAIN MYSTERY EPISODE PROMOTION
Mystery Narrator: This week on Captain Mystery - Aliens Among Us!
Captain Mystery: Aliens. Beings from another world with thoughts and plans incomprehensible to human imaginings. Yet we will attempt to investigate the reports of alien encounters, from flying saucer sightings in our own backyard to accounts from World War II veterans in England, France, and Germany, as well as the stories of professional pilots and astronomers. Are these merely explainable phenomena that can be disproven with scientific study and analysis? Or, as many now say, are Aliens Among Us?
Mystery Narrator: Tune in this Saturday at 7 PM as Captain Mystery delves into his most out-of-this-world mystery yet -- Aliens Among Us!
=============================================
Annie: Wow, that’s exciting! I can’t wait to tune in to Captain Mystery.
Randy: Indeed. But for now, citizens-- we end our news broadcast with a special message from our sponsor, Sunshine Dairy.
==============================================
SUNSHINE DAIRY COMMERCIAL
(begin line present in every commercial): Misty (the Sunshine Dairy Milkmaid): Sunshine Dairy -- fresh from the cow to you [cow mooing]!
Misty: Sunshine Dairy would like to request that people keep aggressive or territorial animals inside when the Sunshine Dairy delivery truck is scheduled to pass through your neighborhood, after an incident in the Pleasantdale Pastures area that has delayed service and inconvenienced our driver and our loyal customers. Remember, our drivers have to bring Sunshine to every house in Pleasantdale! Thank you.
(end line present in every commercial): Misty: Sunshine Dairy -- fresh from the cow to you [cow mooing]!
Randy: Good morning, Pleasantdale! This is Randal “Randy” Johnson.
Annie: And I’m Annabelle “Annie” Mitchell. We hope you’re having a Pleasant day!
Randy: Today’s top news story is a transportation mishap. The on-road leading to the interstate north to New York City is temporarily closed due to a bridge collapse. Mayor Tuttleford has vowed to get the bridge back in working order as soon as possible. He is working closely with the New Jersey Department of Transportation to make this happen - but for now, those heading to the big city will need to take the detour along the southern interstate to get to their destination.
Annie: Due to traffic and route, this can add up to an hour to your commute time - so be sure to leave early to get to your destination on time. Now let’s talk about that mysterious bright flash that had a lot of people worried last week. Rumors were flying - everything from Communist invasion to alien attack.
(Both Laugh)
Randy: The official police word on the ‘mysterious’ light is that it was nothing more than some bikers setting off fireworks in the woods. A small fire was caused as a result, but there were no injuries.
Annie: What ruffians, Randy.
Randy: I’ll say. In other police news, we have a missing hunter who needs to be found. Officials report that Stuart Henderson was last seen by his wife Patty five days ago, when he left on a hunting trip to try out the new gun he’d received over the holidays.
Annie: Poor Patty and her boy, Stewie Jr, are frantic. Anyone who knows of Stuart Senior’s current whereabouts, or who has seen him in the last five days, is urged to contact us here at the radio station, or call the sheriff right away with any information.
Randy: What a tragic situation. But speaking of guns, here’s a word from one of our sponsors -- Seth’s Arms.
===========================================
SETH ARMS COMMERCIAL
Gordon Seth: [countryish semi-monotone] Hello. I’m Gordon Seth, of Seth Arms. We provide a variety of rifles, shotguns, pistols, ammunition, and other firearm accessories for the discerning huntsman. Come by today and choose from our fine line of hunting products, including the Savage 24 combination .22 rifle and shotgun for only $39.95 if you mention this advertisement, great for hunting, home defense, and civil defense. Stop by today and bring home a gun the entire family can enjoy.
[whispered just before tape clips off] ...how was that?
===========================================
Annie: Thank you, Seth... I’m sure we’ll... be stopping in.
Randy: *clears throat* Now back to the news. Annie, did you know this Saturday is Founder’s Day?
Annie: Of course, Randy! How could I forget? It’s the day we celebrate those pioneering men who named our pleasant little town, way back when they bought it from the Indians for three blankets and a large cheese.
Randy: And How. (Indian-ish How)
(Both laugh)
Annie: There’ll be games, skits, contests, and civic speeches from Mayor Tuttleford and the city council. It’s sure to be a swell time for all.
Randy: And after you return home from Founder’s Day festivities, be sure to tune in to Captain Mystery’s Strange Theater. Let’s see what the Captain’s exploring this week --
===========================================
CAPTAIN MYSTERY EPISODE PROMOTION
Mystery Narrator: This week on Captain Mystery - Aliens Among Us!
Captain Mystery: Aliens. Beings from another world with thoughts and plans incomprehensible to human imaginings. Yet we will attempt to investigate the reports of alien encounters, from flying saucer sightings in our own backyard to accounts from World War II veterans in England, France, and Germany, as well as the stories of professional pilots and astronomers. Are these merely explainable phenomena that can be disproven with scientific study and analysis? Or, as many now say, are Aliens Among Us?
Mystery Narrator: Tune in this Saturday at 7 PM as Captain Mystery delves into his most out-of-this-world mystery yet -- Aliens Among Us!
=============================================
Annie: Wow, that’s exciting! I can’t wait to tune in to Captain Mystery.
Randy: Indeed. But for now, citizens-- we end our news broadcast with a special message from our sponsor, Sunshine Dairy.
==============================================
SUNSHINE DAIRY COMMERCIAL
(begin line present in every commercial): Misty (the Sunshine Dairy Milkmaid): Sunshine Dairy -- fresh from the cow to you [cow mooing]!
Misty: Sunshine Dairy would like to request that people keep aggressive or territorial animals inside when the Sunshine Dairy delivery truck is scheduled to pass through your neighborhood, after an incident in the Pleasantdale Pastures area that has delayed service and inconvenienced our driver and our loyal customers. Remember, our drivers have to bring Sunshine to every house in Pleasantdale! Thank you.
(end line present in every commercial): Misty: Sunshine Dairy -- fresh from the cow to you [cow mooing]!